My 30th Anniversary

On October 3, 2011, Jim and I will celebrate our 30th anniversary. To say we've been through a lot is an understatement.

We each brought two children into the marriage. My two daughters were a bit more willing to welcome Jim as a dad than Jim's two children who already had a mom. I was a widow, so there was no personality in the background fighting my decisions. Thank God for that.

Our children were aged as virtual twins. My oldest and his oldest were 6 months apart (5 years old); and our youngest were 3 months apart (2-3 years old). I can't claim that it was a blast trying to combine two families, two homes and two sets of rules. At times it SUCKED. Jim's oldest daughter, who I now consider one of my very best friends, and I did not get along--we were both vying for Jim's attention.

We bought a home big enough for all of us, except for the fact it only had one bathroom. We were on a tight schedule for sure, but we managed. One by one, they grew up and left the nest. One would think the earthquakes would end once they left home, but that was not the case in our family, They were ten years out of our home before we all became adults (including me) and decided that we could be mortar instead of dynamite.

I adore my stepchildren (now 36 and 32) and have considered them my very own for many years. My children, sometimes living close and sometimes living far away, have come to see Jim as their "daddy" and all is well.

If I were to get a diagnosis tomorrow that I was terminally ill, I would want all of our children, their spouses and children to be around me as much as I possibly could stand--but only if my soulmate, my life-mate and best friend, Jim, was right there beside me. I can't imagine going through a tough time without him, because I have never had to--in 30 years.

Why has our marriage worked? Commitment, God, trust and love. Love is a choice, and long ago we made the choice to love each other. God actually came later in our marriage but has enhanced it beyond belief. We have never given each other a reason to not trust the other and commitment has always been that tiny seed we built our life upon.

I love my Jim more today than yesterday. He is a wonderful provider, counselor, friend, soulmate and lover. I can't imagine there being another man on this earth that is more right for me. I can't believe we've been together for almost 1/3 of a century! I'm shocked he puts up with me and comes home every night to me. I love him beyond description.

Thank you, God, for sending him to me.